One Word's One Month Link-up

Am I just paying lip service

by saying that I will put my life
and my troubles into God's hands?

if that is true, I will accomplish nothing this whole year,

that much I know through my past,

thinking that I am a senior adult

and I should be to manage figuring out my troubles

however, I have made little progress

in handing over these problems:

to recover energy for life

to lay aside old resentments

to rid myself of harbored guilt

of the past that cannot be changed

to make the decision

of whether I want to continue living alone,

to perceive if being single

is God's will

or is His will for me

is to open myself to vulnerability

and risk rejection
when I invite someone into my life
after seven years of widowhood,

dare I entrust God?
dare I not?

usually I think when faced with indecision,
"what's the worst that can happen?"

the only result that I can perceive
is that I will continue to live alone

please pray for me

as I consider surrendering
my obstinacy and fear,
to jump with a leap of faith
and truly ENTRUST
willful self to God.

Blessed be.